Nothing but spoilers
If you aren’t caught up stop reading!!!
It’s October 2017. The 13th season of Supernatural has just started and we are 1 episode into another heart-wrenching journey. And look, we all knew this wasn’t going to be a rib-tickler. Mary is stuck with Lucifer on Earth 2, Castiel looks dead for real this time, and Jack, the literal spawn of Satan, is wandering the earth naked in search of his “father”. (Don’t get me started on that tear-jerker)
Anyone of those things would have been a huge loss but all 3 in one battle?!
Are they trying to kill us?
Now at first, I thought Dean’s reaction to Jack was off – like he was Dean from season 2-3 again – all things not human are evil monsters and we kill on sight. It wasn’t until later, in the car with Sam who was advocating for making sure Jack was evil before killing him, that I realized the difference. He says, “because nothing good happens to us.”
Again, my thoughts went to Dean’s streak of pessimism that bordered on depression. You remember right? It was after they’d lost Bobby to the Leviathans in season 7. Bobby noticed it first earlier in the season with his, “what’s this new party line? The world’s a suicide case and we’re just hiding the pills?” comment. Frank Devereaux seems to pull him out of it with his “act like a professional” speech. Although, watching Dean force that smile onto his face as he races off to save Sam ripped my guts out.
Now, for the first time in a LONG time, neither of the boys is in immediate peril at the close/opening of a season. Instead, they are surrounded by personal devastation. Sam is throwing himself into the job, desperate for any ray of hope, no matter how small. But Dean…
For the first time since he lost Sam to the cage, Dean’s scaring me.
You’ve probably noticed by now that, while Dean isn’t afraid to get into someone’s face (or chop that face off), he rarely holds back his rage and its purged appropriately on the offending monsters. BUT when he is reduced to feeling truely helpless, he gets quiet; too quiet. The kind of quiet that hesitates in a life and death moment and gets hunters killed, just like Bobby said all those years ago.
So imagine my concern when, after that soul-crushing plea to yet another father figure he feels abandoned by (I’m glaring at you, Chuck!), his only outburst is punching a sign before he falls silent.
His line, “because nothing good happens to us.,” claws it’s way deeper into my gut and I hurt for him. I’ve been there too many times. It’s not a place I’d wish on my worst enemy, let alone someone with Dean’s heart.
Sam is keeping him on his feet, keeping him fighting for now.